The McSuicide Experiment Day Something

My body has gone to the dark side.

Cuz of cupcakes

My body switched into mental sugar mess and now accepts carbs as its source of energy. Woe is paleo primal loving hippy. I went to the store and exchanged her for this. This has it easy woof woof dog to a bone Ainsley that loves being able to just eat burritos at work with my work family. It doesn’t matter if headaches still come right after or it’s causing me to eat faster. I’m dancing with wicked sugar on my lips and it’s orchestra dubstep up in this body and we’ll dance til the night turns black with us….which is pretty early…maybe an Alaska night. *cough*


But yes, today I was supposed to switch over to vegetarian because my second most depressed friend is on it and so now I need to see if the diet could be a contributing factor. I know that there is wrong vegetarian ways and the right ways and I think he’s been doing some of the wrong with his processed food, oh hey there’s the hippy, and tons of carbs, oh and there’s keto me. Yay! Except now there’s a devil shoulder angel moment happening for me. Le sigh.

So popcorn. Addictive. As. Mochi. Ice. Cream. That is the stuff that I knocked myself in and out of keto for. Cuz Trader Joe’s has a green tea version and I can’t make it ketofied….it needs the rice flour apparently for the soft goo of an outside. Ugh…imagining it now is a lovely soft cream melody in my head. Too bad there is no Trader Joe’s here. Oh yeah! Bitch time. I went to Trader Joe’s before this madness experiment began and got some lovely pork shoulder and coconut spray and cheese and now that stuff has to wait for the day I return to keto. Which right now the plan is to go vegetarian for a week, or two if results don’t appear and then go over to the most normal diet I know. From there it will be onto paleo and then back to keto but vegetarian style then just over to keto then finally paleo keto.


Ate so much popcorn and realized my body is surviving on highs of energy sources. It wants it and I get bitchy/hormonal/grrr until there is food and then feel ickmisery for about an hour after and then feel fine until the next starve comes. The popcorn seemed to leave its kernels in my throat though and it hurt for hours and hours after to the point it even slept with me and wouldn’t leave in the morning.

Otherwise, it is really nice to fit in again and just eat the ice cream everyone else is eating and not be like nooooo I’m too good for that. That feeling is frustrating and hits all those primal urges to not be outside of the group. Let me in guys, oh hey, I can be for a few weeks. It’s mad how everyone around me though both seems to crave the sugar or avoid it. There does seem to be some mental health movement around but I can’t tell how deep it is.

I lurk into the conversation now though, as one of them. Me: “Yeah I wanted to go shop today but then I thought of Taco Bell and that was just soooo much easier.” Them: “Dudebro.  I know exactly what you mean! I did that yesterday!” *bonded* *like a coo kid*

Shoot…I only have 25 minutes left to write this. Oh yes, my wifi is gone but for nommading due to the move and not wanting to pay for a router so waiting for two months until the twin moves in to have wifi again. It’s cool though because the University I go to is two minutes away so now I’ll hop into here every night.

At first, I decided to get rid of all the healthy food in the fridge that would otherwise go to waste and just lined zucchini around a skillet, shredded parmesan over it, added chard/turkey pepperonis and poured homemade veggie broth over it. (Save your leftover veggie parts that no one eats in the freezer then boil them in water for this). The chard was so epic. Somehow it had a lemon crisp layer of flavor to it.

Otherwise, my body was fed burritos, even cold ones as there were leftovers from the work meeting this morning (how I even got them). I didn’t like the taste of the bread though. I trained my body or it trained me to just be blech about it. THE POTATOES THOUGH. So soft. Much love. Will eat them during vegetarian week like the missing wench I am that just wants carbs everywhere. I would edit this but there’s no time. Here’s Me in the Raw.


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SI-Ya Ray

Greetings beautiful people. I bliss out over crafting new flavors, interviewing test makers and restaurant owners and discovering the brain.

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