Santa Isn’t Real

Even in death we cling to ourselves.

Store our energy in the boxese…boxes of wood, the trees of death.

We put death into death.
We abuse both right now…on this earth. We hurt and then we hurt outwards, projecting our pain into life.

I think if I told it to a child, that they were other life forms outside of us and they might be watching us and even sometimes want to take us away from here, they would believe it.

They wouldn’t fear believing
Children believe in everything until  we teach them to fear it.

I fear believing….ever since Santa Claus turned into a pedophile…we think that’s funny but…have you ever realized how symbolic and saddening that is?
This man who brought us gifts and sparked us into believing in something, and even gave our parents a feeling of belief (possibly why they cling to and carry it into other generations) is then…shocked out of us.

I remember when my twin learned Santa wasn’t real. We were in a mall and my brother and I were talking about how funny/odd it was that kid’s still believed in Santa, or a kid was passing by and talking about Santa giving them gifts and we laughed about it as though we were now suddenly above that child, as though by having that reality shattered we were superior.

Abbey heard. She stopped. 

“Santa isn’t real?”
Keep in your mind we were around tenish, and her twin was suddenly separate. I was part of a lie and a different reality. She was about to face one of the most genuine reality shatters of our existence.

*My mother, my brother and I all furrow our eyebrows with a ‘seriously’ look. We show no comfort or caring or holding of her, but instead the bright mall lights and sense of being superior….*

“No.” Says brother Zack.
“You’re kidding right” says her twin Ainsley. 

*Ainsley’s thoughts and body display a superiority of knowing something her twin does not*
*The family is mocking her reality shatter*

*Abbey starts crying. The family fears looking weak and laughs some then says that Santa was never real. It’s okay.*

“What about The Easter Bunny? The Tooth Fairy?”
*everything she believed in is shattered. The reality of a fairy that cared for her and brought money, that sparked dreams and imagination, was a lie. The bunny she had been told all her life was real and cared for her, that brought her presents to prove it existed, never existed at all*
“None of them are real. I can’t believe you didn’t know that”

*The family continues to mock her, fearing other people hearing that someone so old could still believe*

“Come on let’s go”. Says the mother. The one who most fears people’s judgement.
*Abbey tries to stop crying through a shattered reality*
*The family mocks her for years to come…never realizing what they’d done until Ainsley typed it out and right after or before publishing this goes to hug Abbey who is watching … ironically…. Once Upon A Time a kitchen away (in the living room). Maybe she still believes in something…maybe the rest of us fear to believe*

In reality of the shattered and unshattered present both Abbey and I have seen enough to know there is magic in this world. Magic is simply what should not be happening on this Earth/when it is manipulated. Or possibly magic is all just another lie.

Published by

SI-Ya Ray

Greetings beautiful people. I bliss out over crafting new flavors, interviewing test makers and restaurant owners and discovering the brain.

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